There's Backwards and there's . . .

BurkeWords

Monday, December 15, 1997

Speaking before a group of Arkansas pals this past Saturday (December 13, 1997), Bill Clinton unleashed the anger he feels toward Republican critics. He is quoted as saying that they are "almost pathologically obsessed with personal destruction."

With apologies to Johnnie Cochran (not really, but it sounds funny), isn't this a case of the pot calling the kettle black?

Look at the lives of everyone who has come near the Clintons. Better yet, look at their deaths. Those that aren't dead or in jail just find themselves discredited to the fullest extent of James Carville, who apparantly breathes through the pores in his skin because he never seems to come up for air, or brushed aside by Mike McCurry as a member of the "hate radio" cabal.

Billy Dale wasn't a crony of Clinton, but that was his problem. The Clinton administration tried to destroy him, but in this instance failed, but not before he used up a couple of years of his life defending himself from phony charges. And Paula Jones is just some "trailer-park bimbo with big hair" (ever wonder what would have happened if he had said "housing-project bimbo with an afro"?).

Clinton is a pox. All that come near him wither, decay and die. Or rot in jail cells.

But it is the Republicans who are "pathologically obsessed with personal destruction."

I wonder how Vince Foster and Ron Brown would feel about that statement.

Time for the interesting rumors of the week:

These were snippets picked up on one radio station or another, not the rantings of some on the Net. I won't claim to back these up with any actual clippings.

Rumor No. 1: It's been reported that Ron Brown apparantly had a bullet hole in his head when his body was found at the crash site. Photos of X-rays of Brown's skull show what could be bullet fragments in his brain or just over-exposed film. The actual X-rays don't show anything -- they're missing. Just like that large front door from the Waco compound; you know, misplaced somewhere. Additionally, the one survivor of the crash, a stewardess, died mysteriously afterwards.

Rumor No. 2: My favorite of the recent spate of rumors. Supposedly (a warning flag indicator if ever there was one), someone who should have been on Ron Brown's fateful plane but wasn't had his luck run out last year. Apparantly, he was on Flight 800, which conspiracy buffs have been assured was not hit by a missile.

What's both sad and frightening is not the fact that these rumors are propogating, but that they can be believed so easily given the character of the man in charge at the White House.

It makes you wonder, even as Clinton's minions are trying to portray the GOP as "anti-Asian" because of their opposition to Bill Lann Lee, who would, in turn, throw thousands of hard-working, studious Asians out of college to make room for underachievers, even as the Democrats look to this situation in a vein attempt to capture the Asian vote, viewers of the Black Entertainment Network are beginning to believe that Ron Brown was murdered.

So many questions to be asked, so much time for the answers to surface.

Folks, rumors are fun to hear, but don't fall for them hook, line and sinker. You may believe that President Clinton is a liar and has covered up vast misdeeds. You may believe that he's using legal wrangling to keep himself in office and run out the clock. You may believe that he got away with murder (literally).

But remember, there are two clocks running here. The first is the term clock that expires in January, 2001. The second is the biological clock that expires with Bill Clinton. He's a young, healthy man with medical options available to him that we'll never see (particularly if his health care proposals go through!). Bill Clinton will have to hide from the truth for another four or five decades. So don't fret. The truth will come out eventually.

And the statute of limitations for murder never expires.

The question of what to do with Bill Lann Lee has been settled: Clinton named him acting assistant attorney general for civil rights, a move that will anger some Republicans, but far fewer than would have been angered by a recess appointment. As a bonus, Lee can serve in this post until the end of Clinton's term rather than to the end of 1998.

With that out of the way, I have my own question: Just who was blocking what?

Last night, I heard, yet again, this time on ABC News Tonight, that Lee's nomination was "blocked by Republicans". Hellooooo, ABC, are you listening? Get your facts straight!

The Republicans never blocked the nomination. They were set to reject it outright. It was the Democrats that "blocked the nomination" for fear that it would go up in flames.

Just in case they don't get the message, feel free to stop by their website and leave them email stressing this.

It's hard to compare these two in the same sentence, but I'm going to do it.

Last week, First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton was ejected from the posh University Club in NYC, sent out into the rain and snow, for the crime of rustling tissue paper, spraying perfume and chatting with gossip columnist Cindy Adams.

Actually, it's not clear the reason the party (which included three members of Mrs. Clinton's staff), but consorting with Cindy Adams in the first place could very well do it. Or being seen with her alleged comedian husband, Joey.

But whatever it was, you have to figure it was some major breach of ettiquette to remove the First Lady of the United States for the premises, something which under normal circumstances would be considered a major breach of ettiquette in itself. But if Hillary and company broke the rules, then, yes, out they should go.

That brings me back to Sprewell, who last week publicly apologized to the man he assaulted at a press conference attended by Sprewell's accountant. Can you guess where his interest truly lies? Now, Sprewell has Johnnie Cochran in his corner to establish the fact that this only happened because Sprewell is black and let's face it, the coach needed a good choking anyway. Cochran contends that this wouldn't happen if Sprewell was a white player and besides, this is a racist country.

Forget about the rules, they aren't important. So a rule or two got broken. What's the big deal. This is harmful to America.

Except that this is the same America where the First Lady of the United States was ejected from a social club for crinkling tissue paper. And the last time I looked, she was white.

Johnnie, I have to ask. What would you have said if Winnie Mandela had been thrown out of that club? Or Ruth Messinger? I know your answer already: it wouldn't have happened because they wouldn't have been invited in because this is a racist country.

Well, readers, you can quote me on the following, just make sure you give me the credit for it. I haven't heard it on Letterman, Leno or Politically Incorrect yet, but someone has to say it. Cochran has been accused of continually playing the race card. In fact, he was accused by his own co-counsel of playing it "from the bottom of the deck". When, I happen to think that Johnnie Cochran is quite a bit a character -- he's a card of his own kind.

I just can't tell if he's a Joker or the Ace of Spades.

For those who never tried to tell the future with a deck of playing cards, the Ace of Spades is usually considered an ill-omen and likened to the Death card in Tarot Decks, though I doubt Johnnie will figure that one out.

In an effort to avoid a PR nightmare, the White House leaned on the widow of "former veteran" Larry Lawrence, to request that her husband be removed from the hallowed ground of Arlington, near the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.

It was all her idea. Really.