THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Justice to Investigate New York

In the wake of a single horrifying event committed in New York City's 70th precinct involving a Haitian prisoner and a bathroom plunger, the Justice Department has announced that it will not wait for NYC's investigation to be completed before launching into their own probe. According to Justice, this one incident is indicative of severe civil rights infractions and racist attacks being committed on a citywide scale by New York City police officers. In other news, Janet Reno says that despite a stack of cancelled checks personally endorsed by William Clinton there is still not enough concrete evidence to call upon a special investigator to probe illegal campaign finance allegations.

[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

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