THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Home Runs, Playboy Bunnies, Back Trouble and Gore's Confession

Warning: this page is currently for mature audiences. So is the current President.

Friday, August 14, 1998


Home Run Chase

Three ballplayers, Mark McGwire, Sam Sosa and Ken Griffrey, Jr., are in a race to outdo Roger Marris's home run record and all three are the talk of the sportsworld. However, in the White House, it is believed that none of the near are anywhere near the all-time scoring king.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Thursday, August 13, 1998


Back Troubles

Susan McDougal, currently on trial for non-Whitewater charges, got out of jail free for her bad back. Now Clinton attorney Bruce Lindsey is recovering from back surgery. A pattern may be evolvig among Friends of Bill. It must be the weight of carrying this Presidency.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Wednesday, August 12, 1998


Playboy Bunny Bordello Busted

News Item: A former Playboy Bunny, Judith Kelly Dempsey, allegedly operated an upscale brothel out of her Morris Township, N.J., mansion for the last nine months until authorities closed it down yesterday.

On an unrelated note, President Clinton is considering cancelling his upcoming fundraising appearance in New Jersey.


Tuesday, August 11, 1998


Gore Confesses

[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Al Gore made a startling confession yesterday:

''It's sort of like the evidence is kind of hollering out at you _ HELLO....Unfortunately, despite all this evidence, some in Congress continue to stand in the way.'' -- V.P. Albert Gore, 8/10/98, reported by UPI.

I thought that Gore is looking for his own seat in the Oval Office, but then someone mentioned that he was talking about alleged 'global warming'.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Monday, August 10, 1998


Clinton's Moral Compass

Clinton does have a moral compass. It just points south.
[Nick Combs, nccombs@ibm.net]


Click here for an important note.



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