THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Gambling with his Future and Other Jokes

Warning: this page is currently for mature audiences. So is the current President.

Friday, September 11, 1998


Did You Ever Notice...

Have you ever noticed that if you replace the 'G' in Gore with a 'V' and mix up the letters, you get Al Over. And, let's face it, it's Al Over, folks. Turn the lights off when you leave.

(Of course, that would make his wife Tipper Over.)
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Enjoy the weekend! I know I will!!


Thursday, September 10, 1998


Gambling With His Future

Now that Judge Kenneth Starr has delivered his report to Congress, President Clinton has several options before him, and whichiver one he takes will be a gamble at best.
Mr. President, let me assure you that you can gamble with your future any way you like, but the odds always favor the House.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Shut Up, Little Susie!
Superior Court Judge Leslie Light warned Susan McDougal to sit still and be quiet or face removal from the courtroom. In a stunning admonishment of the defendant, the judge asked "Are you totally unable to keep your mouth shut?"
At which point, Ken Starr entered the courtroom and replied, "No, she isn't."
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Wednesday, September 9, 1998


Lewinsky Testimony Revealed!

The Bill Clinton Joke-of-the-Day Page has secretly received a revealing of grand jury testimony:

Starr: Miss Lewinsky, can you tell us what happened after you entered the Oval Office that day.
Lewinsky: The first thing I did was jump back, startled. I hadn't expected to find a cold, wet nose between my legs.
Starr: Mr. Clinton's dog was in his office?
Lewinsky: No.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Tuesday, September 8, 1998


Correction! Correction!

Correction: The Congressional Democrats are worried about fall elections, not full erections as previously reported.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


Monday, September 7, 1998


HAPPY LABOR DAY!


Click here for an important note.



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