THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Thanksgiving and Shakespeare

Warning: this page is currently for mature audiences. So is the current President.

Wednesday, November 25, 1998


What I'm Thankful For This Year

Yes, there have been some setbacks lately, and things are looking gloomy, but there are still some things to be thankful for this year:

5. That some Republicans, like Rep. Bob Barr, still have spines an continue to stand against the mob rule and stand for the Constitution.
4. That Al Gore continues to make a bigger fool of himself day by day, making it less likely he'll ever make it to the Oval Office.
3. That Jay Severin (a Libertine not a Republican) is out there and telling it like it is.
2. That a babe like Ann Coulter is on our side.
1. For all of you.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Tuesday, November 24, 1998


Republican Thanksgiving

Did you hear about the new Republican turkeys?
They have no backbone.

You can still find a bunch of them in Washington. But hurry, most of them will be gone two years.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Clinton's Thanksgiving Address

Stay tuned for President Clinton's Thanksgiving Address. According to an early draft that's been leaked to me, he's planning on apologizing to all American Indians for stealing their lands and will then sign an Executive Order giving back all states that are still Republican.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Monday, November 23, 1998


The Bard of the Beltway

If Shakespeare were alive today and living in Washington, D.C., what would he title a play about the current administration?

How about


[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Did you hear what Shakespeare said after bumping into Bill Clinton in the men's room?
"Much ado about nothing."
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]


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