THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Impeachment Week: Education, Software, Desert Fox and more

Warning: this page is currently for mature audiences. So is the current President.

Friday, December 18, 1998


Desert Fox Jokes

Did you hear that "Operation Desert Fox" was being renamed "Operation Free Willy"
[Submitted by Kerrigan Peter, kerriganpe@M1.IRS.GOV, and and others]

I, myself, had wondered why the Clinton Administration chose to name their operation after a Nazi General, but I'll defer to the explantion that I was given that he actually named it after some babe.
[Posted by C. J. Burke, as discussed on Free Republic yesterday.]

By the way, in response to the charge that Rommel was not a member of the Nazi party, I'd have to pull a Clinton here:
If what was meant was that Rommel was both a Nazi and a General, that charge is not correct, but if what was meant was that Rommel was a General for the Nazis, then that would depend upon what the meaning of the word "for"" is.
[Submitted for your approval by C. J. Burke]

Thursday, December 17, 1998


Adviser Misunderstands Recommendation

As impossible as it is to believe, the military strategists in conference with President Clinton yesterday misunderstood the Commander-in-Chief's recommendation with regard to bombing Iraq. What follows is the just-leaked audio recorded in the meeting:

Voice #1: The public may start screaming "Wag the Dog" if we bomb the day for the impeachment vote. Have you considered this?
VP Al Gore: Who giving a flying f---?
President Clinton: I have, aboard Air Force One. I highly recommend it.
[C. J. Burke, cjburke@io.com]

Wednesday, December 16, 1998


True Story: Protest Sign

This is reportedly a true news story:
A woman in New Jersey became so fed up with the President that she built a protest sign on her front lawn. The local authorities informed her that it had to come down. It seems that she failed to file for an erection permit for the sign.
These days, you need permits for everything!
[Submitted by cjburke@io.com, I can't take credit for it -- I actually read this!]

Tuesday, December 15, 1998


Presidential Software

Q: What software did Monica use to access Bill's website?
A: PKUNZIP
[Raj Naik, rnaik@moose.co.uk]

Monday, December 14, 1998


President's New Education Initiative

The President unveiled plans for a new educational TV show for Public Broadcasting. The show would center around Ken Starr, Henry Hyde and the rest of the GOP, and every time they tried to hold a hearing, depose a witness or ask for evidence, the President will take off for a distant part of the planet.
The show will be called "Where in the World in William J. Clinton?"
[cjburke@io.com]

Please not that a backup plan calls for the President to simply bomb some country to distract the media instead.
[cjburke@io.com]

"He's been to China and Gaza and Russia, Korea . . . "
[cjburke@io.com]

Click here for an important note.

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