THE BILL CLINTON JOKE-OF-THE-DAY ARCHIVE

Aguilera, New Year's Churches, Hillary & Homeless, Gore & Guards, Forgive & Forget and Lots of Love

Warning: this page is currently for mature audiences. So is the current President.

Friday, December 3, 1999


Al's Autobiography?

coming soon to Amazon.com from the father of the Internet
"Love Story to Love Canal - It's All About Love: the Albert Gore Story"
[C. J. Burke]


Thursday, December 2, 1999


Forgive & Forget

In Europe last week, Bill Clinton urged the Serbs and Kosovars to forgive and forget their past differences so that they could worked together to build a better and brighter future.
Then he hurried back home to the states so he could pounce on all those lousy Republicans in Election 2000.
[C. J. Burke]

Forgive & Forget, Part II

Drudge is reporting that this story is about break wide open: Hillary's divorcing Bill as soon as he's out of office.
Anyone turning the other cheek in that household will likely have it slapped.
[C. J. Burke]


Wednesday, December 1, 1999


Hillary & the Homeless

While in New York City yesterday, Hillary criticized Mayor Guiliani on the problem of the homeless in New York City.
When asked for a comment, Rudy replied, "So does Mrs. Clinton have a place to stay while she's in the city?"
[C. J. Burke]

Gore & his Guard

Al Gore has denied that while in Viet Nam he had personal bodyguards looking after him.
In truth, they were forest rangers.
[anonymous, heard on a radio call-in show]


Tuesday, November 30, 1999


New Year's Eve Plans for the First Couple

According to a spokesperson for Hillary Clinton, the First Couple will be apart for the start of the year 2000. Mrs. Clinton, starting her Senate campaign, will try to find an appropriate function in New York City. Because Times Square would be a security nightmare, a more suitable location, such as the Cathedral of St. John the Divine, will be sought.
And according to Hillary, Bill has found religion to and she believes that he will be spending the evening in North Carolina. She overheard Bill saying that he'd "love to do Charlotte Church".
[C. J. Burke]


Monday, November 29, 1999


Christine Aguilera To Do the White House

It's been announced that singer star Christine Aguilera will perform at the White House. Naturally, there will be chaperones present. One for Miss Aguilera, and several more for the president.
[C. J. Burke]


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