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An ALT.DAYS Production,
A Division of Peel Productions, Inc.
Air Date: December 17, 1997
Time: Several Days After #164,
Evening
Copyright 1997
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEVE ENTERS TO SEE STEPHANIE JUMPING UP AND DOWN ON THE BED.
STEVE: When your mom said you could sleep over, little Sweetness, I think she thought there might actually be some sleep.
STEPHANIE: But I'm not sleepy.
HE CATCHES HER IN MID-JUMP.
STEVE: (SMILING) Not tired either?
STEPHANIE: Nope. But...
STEVE: What?
STEPHANIE: Well, maybe I could get sleepy if you told me a story.
STEVE: You think?
STEPHANIE: Maybe.
STEVE: Then get under the covers.
STEPHANIE CRAWLS UNDER THE COVERS AND STEVE TUCKS HER IN.
STEVE: (CONT'D) A story, huh? The Princess and the Pea?
STEPHANIE: Borrrrrrrrrring.
STEVE: Sleeping Beauty?
STEPHANIE: Have it on video.
JACK: (V.O.) Jennifer, I tell you they're thieves. The whole lot of them.
THERE IS A PAUSE AS JACK HEARS JENNIFER'S REPLY.
JACK: (CONT'D) (V.O.) I don't care if they call themselves Christmas carolers, they are just a merry band of mulled cider thieves!
STEVE GRINS AT STEPHANIE.
STEVE: Got it. What if I tell you the story of Robin Hood?
JACK POKES HIS HEAD IN FROM THE HALLWAY.
JACK: Another thief? Are you corrupting this child with the story of an anarchist thief? (ENTERS THE ROOM) Why don't I tell the child something a bit more edifying? Greek mythology, perhaps. There is a particularly good moral for little girls in the tale of Pandora which...
STEVE: (INTERRUPTING) Robin Hood was a very special thief, Jack.
JACK: Ask any Salem County judge and he'll tell you they all say that.
STEVE THROWS A PILLOW AT JACK. WHEN IT HITS JACK, IT BURSTS AND FEATHERS EXPLODE ALL OVER HIM. STEPHANIE STARTS GIGGLING AS STEVE SETTLES BACK AGAINST THE REMAINING PILLOWS.
STEVE: Now, this all began a long time ago...
JACK: (INTERRUPTING) In a galaxy far, far away.
That's "Star Wars." If you are determined to
tell this socialist story about stealing from
hard working, successful citizens to give
alms to the rabble, then it begins:
Come listen awhile,
You gentlemen -- and ladies-- all
That are in this bower within,
For a story of gallant bold Robin Hood
I propose now to begin....
JENNIFER: (V.O.) Abigail Johanna Deveraux, come back here. You are going to take a bath before going to bed.
JACK: I'll be right back. Hold my place.
STEVE: (SMILING) 'Night, Jack. (TURNS TO STEPHANIE) Now where were we? Oh yeah, a long time ago in a place far away, a man came home after being away at the crusades for many years...
OUT ON STEVE STROKING STEPHANIE'S HAIR.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE IS SITTING UP IN BED. SHE HAS ALL THE BLANKETS PULLED UP AROUND HER. STEVE SITS ON THE BED NEXT TO HER.
STEVE: The man's name was Robin Patchy Hood. He got the nickname "Patchy" because he had an eye patch over one of his eyes.
STEPHANIE: Just like you, Daddy!
STEVE: That's right. Just like me. (BEAT) After being away for a long long time, Robin Patchy Hood returned to his family home, Locksley castle. He had just escaped from a prison in the east...
FADE TO: LOCKSLEY CASTLE. ROBIN PATCHY HOOD APPROACHES THE CASTLE ON HORSEBACK. THE CASTLE IS IN RUINS AND APPEARS ABANDONED. ROBIN DISMOUNTS AND STARTS WALKING AROUND THE REMAINS OF THE CASTLE.
ROBIN: My home... my family... What has happened here? Who is responsible for such destruction?
A WEAK AND SCRATCHY VOICE COMES FROM THE SHADOWS.
VERN: (V.O.) He who is nothing but evil.
ROBIN: Who is there? Make yourself known so I may see who is speaking!
WALKING SLOWLY, VERN, ONE OF THE FAMILY SERVANTS, EMERGES FROM THE SHADOWS. HE WALKS WITH A CANE AND DOES NOT LOOK AT ANYTHING IN PARTICULAR.
VERN: Ah, but I cannot see you.
ROBIN: Vern? Vern, is it you?
VERN: Yes. Yes, it's me. But who are you? My eyes were badly damaged in the fire and I can no longer see.
ROBIN WALKS OVER TO VERN AND PUTS HIS HANDS ON VERN'S SHOULDERS.
ROBIN: It is Robin.
VERN: Robin? It can't be! We thought you were dead.
ROBIN: There were times that I thought myself dead as well. I was in prison until a few weeks ago.
ROBIN WALKS OVER TO A BROKEN VASE.
ROBIN: (CONT'D) Tell me, Vern, what happened here?
VERN WALKS OVER TO WHERE ROBIN WAS STANDING, BUT ROBIN HAS ALREADY MOVED TO ANOTHER SPOT.
VERN: After you went with King Roman to go fight in the crusades, your family's land came under the watch of Sheriff Lawrence of Nottingham. He took control of it and everything else under the King's rule.
ROBIN: But why all of this? Why destroy everything?
VERN REALIZES THAT ROBIN IS NO LONGER STANDING IN FRONT OF HIM AND MOVES TO ROBIN'S VOICE. BY THE TIME VERN REACHES THE SPOT, ROBIN HAS MOVED. A CHICKEN WALKS TO WHERE ROBIN WAS STANDING, SO IT APPEARS THAT VERN IS TALKING TO THE CHICKEN.
VERN: Because Sheriff Lawrence is evil. He is evil and greedy. He and his men pillaged the castle and drove your family away.
THE CHICKEN CACKLES, STARTLING VERN.
ROBIN: Where did my family go?
ONCE AGAIN, VERN WALKS TO ROBIN'S VOICE.
VERN: Nobody knows. Some people think that the sheriff had them captured and imprisoned. I have also heard that they found solitude in a faraway land.
ROBIN WALKS OVER TO A BROKEN CHAIR AND PICKS IT UP.
ROBIN: He won't get away with this!
ROBIN THROWS THE CHAIR DOWN FORCEFULLY. VERN DECIDES TO SIT DOWN IN THE RUBBLE, GIVING UP TRYING TO FOLLOW ROBIN'S VOICE.
ROBIN: (CONT'D) We'll fight back!
VERN: But we're defenseless, Master Robin. What will you do?
ROBIN: We'll find help. We'll get reinforcements. Surely there are others who have been wronged by this Lawrence.
VERN: There are many, but the sheriff is powerful. Many are too scared to face him. (BEAT) But maybe there are people...
ROBIN: Who? Who do you know?
VERN: I do not know for sure, but there are stories of a group of rebels who live in the deepest part of Sherwood Forest.
ROBIN: Sherwood Forest? I remember childhood stories that the forest is haunted.
VERN: Yes. That could be why the sheriff's men do not venture deep into the forest.
ROBIN: If what you say is true, then we must find these rebels. Maybe they can help us.
ROBIN GETS HIS BAG AND CALLS HIS HORSE. HE HELPS VERN ONTO THE HORSE AND THEN HE GETS ON. THEY START ON THEIR JOURNEY.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE INTERRUPTS STEVE'S STORY.
STEPHANIE: I have to go potty!
STEVE: Okay. Hurry up.
STEPHANIE: I will. Don't start the story again without me.
STEPHANIE GETS OUT OF BED AND RUNS OUT OF THE DOOR. OUT ON STEVE, SMILING AND SHAKING HIS HEAD.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE RUNS BACK INTO THE ROOM AND JUMPS INTO BED. STEVE COVERS HER WITH THE BLANKETS AND SITS DOWN.
STEVE: All set?
STEPHANIE: Uh-huh. Start the story again, please.
STEVE: Okay. Robin Patchy Hood and Vern head into Sherwood Forest to find the rebels...
FADE TO: SHERWOOD FOREST. ROBIN AND VERN RIDE CAUTIOUSLY INTO THE FOREST. IT IS DARK AND COLD. STRANGE ANIMAL NOISES CAN BE HEARD IN THE DISTANCE.
VERN: I don't like the sounds of things. It feels awfully spooky here.
ROBIN: There's nothing to be afraid of. It's just the sounds of nature.
VERN: If this is what nature sounds like, I don't want any part of it.
THEY RIDE SOME MORE. ROBIN SQUINTS AS HE TRIES TO LOOK THROUGH THE TREES.
ROBIN: It's so hard to see anything here. (BEAT) I'm starting to think that the stories about a band of rebels is just that... a story.
VERN: How long have we been here?
ROBIN: Long enough to see that there's nobody around. I think it's time to head back and rethink our strategy.
ROBIN TURNS THE HORSE AROUND. SUDDENLY THREE MEN JUMP DOWN FROM THE TREES. ONE OF THE MEN GRABS THE HORSE WHILE THE OTHER TWO TAKE HOLD OF ROBIN AND VERN.
ROBIN: What's going on here?
BO: You're trespassing.
ROBIN: Who are you?
NICK: That's none of your business.
BEFORE ROBIN CAN SAY ANOTHER WORD, BO AND NICK BLINDFOLD HIM AND TIE HIS HANDS BEHIND HIS BACK. THEY ALSO TIE VERN'S HANDS.
SHANE: I've got his horse. Let's go.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE SITS UP.
STEPHANIE: Oh, no! Who are the guys who took Robin and Vern?
STEVE: I was just about to tell you. The men took Robin and Vern to their hideout...
FADE TO: MERRY MEN'S HIDEOUT. BO, NICK, AND SHANE LEAD ROBIN AND VERN INTO THE HIDEOUT. THEY ARE MET BY THREE OTHER MEN: BILLY SCARLETT, ABE, AND RICHARD. THEY PLACE THEM IN FRONT OF THEIR LEADER, LITTLE HOMEY. BO TAKES OFF ROBIN'S BLINDFOLD.
LITTLE HOMEY: What do we have here?
NICK: We caught these two sneaking around.
SHANE: They brought a nice looking horse with them. We could use their horse.
ROBIN: We're looking for a band of rebels that might be able to help us.
LITTLE HOMEY: Help you?
VERN: Yes. Do you know who this man is? He is Robin of Locksley.
LITTLE HOMEY: In this forest, it doesn't matter who you are.
ROBIN: I need your help to take down the evil Sheriff Lawrence.
ABE: You need our help?
ROBIN: Yes. He and his men have pillaged and burnt down my family's home. I have to make him pay, but I can't do it alone. I've heard stories about your band of rebels. Maybe together we can take this man down.
BILLY: I don't believe him. I think he's a spy for the sheriff.
ROBIN: I'm no spy.
LITTLE HOMEY: There's only one way to know for sure. I challenge you to a duel.
ROBIN: Very well. What weapons will we use?
LITTLE HOMEY: In this forest, the man in charge is the one who can sing the blues the best. (SNAPS HIS FINGERS) My lute!
RICHARD BRINGS LITTLE HOMEY A LUTE. LITTLE HOMEY BEGINS TO STRUM THE LUTE AND SING THE BLUES. AFTER HE IS FINISHED, THE OTHER MERRY MEN APPLAUD.
LITTLE HOMEY: See if you can top that.
NICK: Yeah, right. Nobody can out-blues Little Homey.
ROBIN HOLDS OUT HIS ARMS. BO UNTIES HIM. ROBIN TAKES OUT A HARMONICA AND STARTS PLAYING. HE IS SO GOOD THAT ALL THE MERRY MEN BEGIN TO TAP THEIR FEET TO HIS TUNE. WHEN HE FINISHES, THE MEN ERUPT IN APPLAUSE.
LITTLE HOMEY: That decides it. No stooge of the sheriff's could play the blues like that. What do you say, men? Shall we help this Robin of Locksley?
ALL THE MEN EXCEPT FOR BILLY SCARLETT RAISE THEIR VOICES IN APPROVAL. LITTLE HOMEY TURNS TO BILLY SCARLETT.
LITTLE HOMEY: What's wrong, Billy?
BILLY: I still don't trust him.
BO: Why not?
BILLY: I just don't.
SHANE: C'mon. You heard him. You know that none of the sheriff's men can even carry a tune.
BILLY: I know. But still...
LITTLE HOMEY: I think we can trust this man.
BILLY: All right. (TO ROBIN) But I'm still keeping my eye on you.
ROBIN: Don't worry. You can trust me.
LITTLE HOMEY: So do you have a plan on how we can take down the sheriff and his men?
ROBIN: I've been thinking about it...
ALL THE MEN GATHER AROUND ROBIN TO HEAR HIS PLAN. VERN ACCIDENTALLY BUMPS INTO BILLY SCARLETT.
BILLY: Hey! Watch where you're going!
VERN: Pardon me.
BILLY: (MUMBLING) Worthless scumbag...
BILLY SCARLETT JOINS THE OTHERS LISTENING TO ROBIN'S PLAN.
ROBIN: I understand that the sheriff is taxing all the people of Nottingham until they have nothing left.
LITTLE HOMEY: That's right. Not even anything left to eat.
ROBIN: Then the best way to hurt the sheriff is through his money pouch.
ABE: How are we going to do that? The sheriff has more money than anybody.
ROBIN: We're going to steal it from him.
RICHARD: Steal it?
ROBIN: Yes, but it's not really stealing if we give it back to the people. It was their money to begin with.
LITTLE HOMEY: I like the way this man thinks. (TO ROBIN) Welcome to the club, Robin Patchy.
ROBIN: Thanks, Little Homey. Now here's what we're going to do. First, I want to do some spying...
OUT ON ROBIN, DETAILING THE REST OF HIS PLAN.
NOTTINGHAM CASTLE. THE MORNING SUN LOOMS LARGE OVER THE CASTLE. ROBIN PATCHY HOOD, DISGUISED AS A BLIND BEGGAR, HAS MADE HIS WAY TO THE CHAPEL. HE IS HOLDING A SMALL WOODEN BOWL.
ROBIN: Alms for the poor...
THE PEOPLE OF NOTTINGHAM LOOK UPON ROBIN WITH PITY.
WOMAN #1: Poor man, to have lost thy sight!
WOMAN #2: May the Lord be with you!
THE WOMEN DROP COINS INTO ROBIN'S BOWL, THEN WALK AWAY.
ROBIN: (SOTTO VOCE) A worthy disguise. (BEAT) Now, to survey this place.
ROBIN SURVEYS THE CHAPEL. STILL FEIGNING BLINDNESS, HE MAKES HIS WAY OVER TO ONE OF THE ALTARS. OTHERS IN THE CHAPEL THINK THE BLIND BEGGAR IS JUST FEELING HIS WAY AROUND THE ITEMS AND DO NOT SEE THAT SEVERAL OF THE SMALL GOLD AND SILVER TRINKETS HAVE DISAPPEARED INTO ROBIN'S POCKETS.
ROBIN: (SOTTO VOCE) A fine price for these. (BEAT) Sheriff Lawrence will be pissed.
SHERIFF LAWRENCE ENTERS THE CHAPEL.
LAWRENCE: You, there! Unhand my possessions this instant!
ROBIN STEPS BACK FROM THE ALTAR.
ROBIN: Alms for the poor, sir?
LAWRENCE GRABS THE BOWL FROM ROBIN'S HAND AND SEES ONLY THE COINS LEFT BY THE WOMEN. LAWRENCE DROPS THE BOWL TO THE FLOOR.
LAWRENCE: Leave now, beggar, or the next thing you'll see is Nottingham's dungeon.
ROBIN: But sir, as you can tell, I am not able to see anything.
LAWRENCE: Then you won't know that the rats are approaching until it's too late. (BEAT) Leave.
ROBIN MAKES HIS WAY OUT OF THE CHAPEL. AS HE APPROACHES THE EXIT, HE NOTICES THE SIDE STAIRS. MAKING SURE THAT LAWRENCE IS NOT FOLLOWING, ROBIN GOES UP THE STAIRS. HE FINDS A DOOR THAT IS LOCKED FROM THE OUTSIDE. HE RELEASES THE LATCH AND OPENS THE DOOR. ROBIN IS STUNNED TO SEE SWEET MAID MARIAN.
MARIAN: Who's there?
ROBIN: Marian? Marian, sister of King Roman... what are you doing locked up in here?
MARIAN: How do you know my name?
ROBIN: Marian, it's me... Robin. Robin of Locksley.
MARIAN: Robin, my childhood friend?
ROBIN: We were more than just friends, Sweetness.
MARIAN: Robin is dead.
ROBIN: I get that a lot. But as you can see, I'm very much alive.
MARIAN: But how do I know that you are who you say you are?
ROBIN: Remember old Vern? How my brother William would tease him at our family picnics?
MARIAN: William was always a peculiar child... Oh, Robin, it is you!
ROBIN: Why are you here?
MARIAN: The sheriff locked me up in here the same day that Roman left for the fighting. (BEAT) If Lawrence finds you here, he will kill you.
ROBIN: His evil dudeness will have to catch me first.
ROBIN TAKES MARIAN'S HAND AND KISSES IT GENTLY.
ROBIN: (CONT'D) It's too dangerous now, but I will be back for you. (BEAT) But I must help my people first.
MARIAN: I understand, and will do whatever I can to help.
ROBIN: I'll send word to you as soon as I can.
ROBIN TURNS TO EXIT.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. ABIGAIL RUNS INTO THE ROOM.
ABIGAIL: You can't catch me!
HER BATHROBE AND THE TRAIL OF WATER BEHIND HER INDICATES THAT SHE HAS ESCAPED FROM THE BATHTUB.
ABIGAIL: (CONT'D) Hi, Uncle Steve!
OUT ON ABIGAIL'S GIGGLING.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. ABIGAIL, STEVE, AND STEPHANIE. IN PROGRESS.
STEVE: Hey there, Abby. You done with your bath?
ABIGAIL: (GIGGLING) Uh-huh.
STEPHANIE GIGGLES ALONG WITH ABIGAIL.
STEVE: Looks to me like you're still in the middle of it.
JENNIFER ENTERS.
JENNIFER: There you are!
ABIGAIL STARTS TO RUN, BUT JENNIFER GRABS HER.
JENNIFER: (CONT'D) Time to finish your bath, young lady.
ABIGAIL SQUEALS AND GIGGLES.
JENNIFER: (CONT'D) (TO STEVE) Sorry about the interruption.
STEVE: (SMILING) No problem. (TO ABIGAIL) Good night, Abby.
STEPHANIE: 'Night, Abby!
JENNIFER: Say goodnight, Abby.
ABIGAIL: (STILL GIGGLING) G'night, Abby.
JENNIFER ROLLS HER EYES AND CARRIES ABIGAIL OUT OF THE ROOM AND CLOSES THE DOOR BEHIND HER.
STEVE: Okay, little Sweetness, where were we?
STEPHANIE: Robin and Marian in the castle.
STEVE: Oh, yeah. So, after checking out the castle, Robin figured out a plan. A few days later...
FADE TO: SHERWOOD FOREST. A CARRIAGE WITH A BROKEN WHEEL SITS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MAIN PATH. FRIAR JOHN TUCK STUMBLES AROUND THE CARRIAGE, APPARENTLY DRUNK.
JOHN: Blasted wheel...
A CARAVAN APPROACHES AND COMES TO A STOP WHEN THEY SEE THE DISABLED CARRIAGE. THE MEN'S UNIFORMS REVEAL THEM TO BE SOLDIERS OF NOTTINGHAM. THE TWO MEN IN THE LEAD CARRIAGE DISMOUNT AND APPROACH FRIAR JOHN.
SOLDIER #1: Move your carriage, Friar.
SOLDIER #2: We're on an urgent errand for the sheriff. Clear the way so that we may pass.
JOHN: I'd be happy to, gentlemen, but as you can see, my broken is wheel... er, my wheel is broken.
SOLDIER #1: (SOTTO VOCE) Drunken sot...
JOHN: Would you be so kind as to help me fix it? You'd be helping me do the Lord's work.
SOLDIER #2: Since when is drinking yourself into a stupor the Lord's work?
JOHN: Judge not, lest ye be judged, my son.
SUDDENLY, THE MERRY MEN SPRING FROM THE TREES, BRANDISHING SWORDS AND BOWS.
JOHN: (CONT'D) Oops. I guess it's judgment time.
ROBIN APPEARS FROM BEHIND THE DISABLED CARRIAGE AND DISARMS THE SOLDIERS.
ROBIN: Back into your carriage. Now.
THE SOLDIERS CLIMB BACK ONTO THEIR CARRIAGE. THE MERRY MEN BEGIN TAKING CHESTS OF GOLD AND JEWELS FROM THE CARRIAGES AND CARRYING THEM OFF INTO THE FOREST.
SOLDIER #1: You'll pay for this, Patchy Hood. The sheriff will hear about this.
ROBIN: Good. Make sure you spell the name right. That's Hood, with an 'H.'
ROBIN TURNS TO FRIAR JOHN.
ROBIN: (CONT'D) Friar, robbing the rich is certainly thirsty work.
JOHN: If you say so.
ROBIN: My men need something to drink.
JOHN: I wish I could help you, son.
ROBIN: Oh, but you can.
ROBIN WHISTLES AND POINTS TO THE FRIAR'S CARRIAGE. THREE OF THE MERRY MEN BEGIN TAKING THE BARRELS OF THE FRIAR'S WINE FROM THE CARRIAGE.
JOHN: You would steal from a man of the cloth?
ROBIN: But we're doing the Lord's work, Friar. Certainly He wouldn't begrudge us something to quench our thirst.
JOHN: Why you little...
FRIAR JOHN LUNGES AT ROBIN, BUT HE STUMBLES AND FALLS FLAT ON HIS FACE. THE MERRY MEN AND THE SOLDIERS LAUGH.
ROBIN: (TO THE SOLDIERS) Shut up. (BEAT) Men, our work here is done!
THE MERRY MEN QUICKLY RUN INTO THE WOODS AND VANISH FROM SIGHT.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM.
STEPHANIE: But what happened to Friar John?
STEVE: Oh, he's okay. Later that day...
FADE TO: SHERWOOD FOREST. FRIAR JOHN'S CARRIAGE IS REPAIRED AND HE IS RIDING DOWN THE PATH, DRINKING FROM A JUG.
JOHN: (MUMBLING) At least those ruffians left me one jug...
SEVERAL MERRY MEN JUMP OUT FROM THE TREES AND STOP THE FRIAR'S CARRIAGE.
BO: Whoa, there, Friar!
JOHN: You! You bloody thieves!
FRIAR JOHN STUMBLES DOWN FROM HIS CARRIAGE, STILL CLUTCHING HIS JUG.
JOHN: (CONT'D) I'll take the rod and the staff to the lot of you!
FRIAR JOHN STEPS TOWARD THE MEN AND THEN DOUBLES OVER. WHEN HE STANDS BACK UP, HE LAUGHS HEARTILY. THE MERRY MEN BEGIN LAUGHING, AS WELL.
SHANE: It appears you may have missed your calling, Friar. You should have gone into the theater.
BO: You certainly had Nottingham's men fooled.
JOHN: A good topic to discuss over a drink, my good man. Why don't you scoundrels take me to your hideout so we can do just that? Unless you've already finished off what you took from my carriage...
THE MERRY MEN ALL LOOK AT EACH OTHER, FEIGNING GUILT.
JOHN: (CONT'D) You didn't.
THE MERRY MEN SMILE AND LAUGH.
BO: Let's go, Friar. The drinks are on you!
JOHN: They certainly are.
FRIAR JOHN AND THE MERRY MEN HEAD OFF INTO THE FOREST.
CUT TO: NOTTINGHAM CASTLE. SHERIFF LAWRENCE IS READING THROUGH SEVERAL PAPERS AT HIS DESK. WITH EACH TURN OF THE PAGE, HIS RAGE INCREASES. HE FINALLY THROWS THE PAPERS ACROSS THE ROOM.
LAWRENCE: Marchand!!!
DEPUTY MARCHAND ENTERS.
MARCHAND: Yes, Sheriff?
LAWRENCE: Do you realize what this Robin Patchy Hood is costing me with all of his thieving and trickery?
MARCHAND: No, sir.
LAWRENCE: Too much, that's what he's costing me! Not only is he stealing my money, but he's becoming a hero to these pathetic people.
MARCHAND: It does seem that he's quite popular...
LAWRENCE: And I can't allow it to continue! I want this man stopped!
MARCHAND: The men are trying, sir, but he's a difficult man to catch.
LAWRENCE: For God's sake, he's just one man! (BEAT) Every man has a weakness. What is his?
MARCHAND: I don't know, sir.
LAWRENCE: Do you know anything about him?
MARCHAND: Rumor has it that Robin Patchy Hood is the finest marksman in the land, despite the fact that he has but one eye.
LAWRENCE: Obviously, the rumor isn't true. He may be the second finest marksman in the land, but no one can best me in a head-to-head contest, no matter how many eyes he...
LAWRENCE PAUSES. AFTER A FEW MOMENTS, HE SMILES.
LAWRENCE: That's it!
MARCHAND: Sir?
LAWRENCE: I know how to catch him! (BEAT) Since your men are completely incompetent and unable to find him, I'll make him come to me!
MARCHAND: How, sir?
LAWRENCE: A contest. A shooting contest. (BEAT) If Hood is half the marksman everyone says he is, he won't be able to resist the challenge. He'll have to come. And when he does, I'll capture him!
MARCHAND: But sir, he's disguised himself before and gotten away without us recognizing him!
LAWRENCE: That's because you and your men are a bunch of oafish buffoons. I am not so easily fooled. I will participate in the contest as well, of course, and I will make sure to examine each competitor closely. How many one-eyed marksmen can there be?
LAWRENCE GRINS AND CHUCKLES MENACINGLY.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) Soon, Robin Patchy Hood, you'll be at my mercy... Oh, wait! I have no mercy!
LAWRENCE LAUGHS MANIACALLY. OUT ON LAWRENCE.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE AND STEVE. IN PROGRESS.
STEPHANIE: Oh, no! Daddy, that evil Lawrence guy isn't going to catch Robin Patchy Hood, is he? (BEAT) Tell me that he isn't!
STEVE: You need to be more patient, little Sweetness... The story's not over yet. (BEAT) Now, where was I...?
FADE TO: NOTTINGHAM. THE PREPARATIONS FOR THE ARCHERY CONTEST HAVE BEEN COMPLETED. LITTLE HOMEY AND THE REST OF THE MERRY MEN ARE ALL IN THE CROWD, WEARING DISGUISES. BILLY SCARLETT STANDS BESIDE ROBIN.
BILLY: Do you truly think you can fool the sheriff? Lawrence may be cruel and evil, but he is not stupid.
ROBIN TURNS TOWARD BILLY AND REVEALS HIS MASK: HIS PATCH IS DISGUISED BY A PAINTED EYE.
ROBIN: Are you always this hard to get along with?
BILLY: Only when I don't trust the people around me. And speaking of untrustworthy...
SHERIFF LAWRENCE APPEARS. HE FRANTICALLY SCOURS THE CROWD, LOOKING FOR ROBIN.
LAWRENCE: You there! I knew it was you, Locksley.
LAWRENCE REMOVES THE MAN'S MASK, REVEALING LITTLE HOMEY.
LITTLE HOMEY: I believe you are mistaken, sir.
LAWRENCE THROWS THE MASK TO THE GROUND IN FRONT OF LITTLE HOMEY AND PROCEEDS TO ANOTHER MAN. AND ANOTHER. AND YET ANOTHER. LAWRENCE THEN SNEAKS UP BEHIND ANOTHER PERSON HE BELIEVES TO BE ROBIN.
LAWRENCE: Caught at last, you scoundrel!
THE PERSON TURNS. IT IS EVE OF DONOVAN MANOR.
EVE: Do I look like some one-eyed avenger to you, bub?
A DISGUSTED LAWRENCE WALKS AWAY. THE PARTICIPANTS IN THE ARCHERY CONTEST ASSEMBLE.
LAWRENCE: As you know, the winner of today's contest will receive a kiss from the very sweet Maid Marian.
MARIAN SNEERS AT LAWRENCE.
MARIAN: (SOTTO VOCE) Now would be a good time to rescue me, Robin.
THE CONTEST BEGINS. THE ARROWS FLY AS THE COMPETITORS VIE FOR THE PRIZE AND THE PEOPLE OF NOTTINGHAM WATCH WITH APPRECIATION. FINALLY, THERE ARE ONLY TWO MEN LEFT: SHERIFF LAWRENCE AND ROBIN PATCHY HOOD. LAWRENCE WALKS OVER TO MARIAN.
LAWRENCE: I may not get my true prize today, but at least I can claim my kiss.
MARIAN: The contest isn't over yet.
LAWRENCE: True.
LAWRENCE SETS UP FOR HIS NEXT SHOT. HIS ARROW HITS THE BULL'S EYE AT ITS CENTER.
LAWRENCE: I believe that should settle things.
ROBIN: Not so fast, Sheriff.
ROBIN TAKES HIS SHOT. HIS ARROW SPLITS LAWRENCE'S IN HALF.
MARIAN: The winner!
LAWRENCE: Curses! Foiled again.
ROBIN WALKS OVER TO WHERE MARIAN STANDS.
ROBIN: I believe I have won the prize, Sweetness.
MARIAN SMILES AND LEANS UP TO KISS ROBIN.
LAWRENCE: Halt!
LAWRENCE STRIDES OVER TO ROBIN.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) You are the only man I have ever seen who can aim so true without closing an eye.
LAWRENCE RIPS ROBIN'S MASK OFF.
LAWRENCE: Robin Patchy Hood! (BEAT) Seize him!
ROBIN PUSHES LAWRENCE AWAY, THEN GRABS MARIAN FOR A QUICK KISS BEFORE LAWRENCE'S MEN CAN REACH HIM. THE MERRY MEN CREATE AN ESCAPE ROUTE FOR ROBIN, WHILE A FUMING LAWRENCE IS REPEATEDLY KNOCKED DOWN IN THE CONFUSION. OUT ON THE MELEE.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE AND STEVE. IN PROGRESS.
STEPHANIE: Yay! Robin won!
STEVE: Yes, he did. But that just seemed to cause more trouble.
STEPHANIE: Why?
STEVE: Because the evil Sheriff Lawrence was a really poor sport and a bad loser...
FADE TO: NOTTINGHAM. DEPUTY MARCHAND IS POSTING A NOTIFICATION THAT SHERWOOD FOREST TAXES ARE OVERDUE AND THE PENALTY IS TO QUADRUPLE THE AMOUNT TO BE PAID.
SIR MICKEY: What's this about taxes being late? They aren't due for another five months.
MARCHAND: Really? (SQUINTING HE READS THE NOTIFICATION) Why, it says right here that the taxes are due no later that 11:21 P.M. on November 29th.
SIR MICKEY: Where does it say that?
MARCHAND: Right there.
SIR MICKEY: Where?
MARCHAND: (POINTING TO A BLANK SPOT ON THE PAPER) There! In the very small print.
SIR MICKEY: I'll protest this in every court in England!
MARCHAND: Sir Mickey Horton Esquire, lawyer who has never won a case, is threatening me with a lawsuit. Now I'm shivering in my slippers.
IVAN COMES OUT OF A ROSE-COVERED COTTAGE DRAGGING THE LADY ALICE BEHIND HIM.
MARCHAND: (CONT'D) Ah, there is my henchman now, and is that your mother with him, Sir Mickey?
IVAN: Deputy Sir, this good lady says that she will pay her taxes.
MARCHAND: With what, pray tell?
LADY ALICE: With donuts, of course!
MISTRESS CAROLINE: Oh, milady, 'tis hopeless. I offered this villain clam chowder and baby-sitting services and he laughed in my face.
IVAN: And broke into hives. He's allergic to mollusks and doesn't have kids.
LADY JOSEPHINE: And I offered green tuna noodle casserole and he would not even taste it.
IVAN: No one in their right mind would.
MARCHAND: Enough of this! Ivan, throw this rabble into the dungeon.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE GRASPS STEVE'S ARM.
STEPHANIE: Oh, Daddy, how horrible!
STEVE: It gets even worse because at the castle, Sheriff Lawrence's guards had captured one of Robin's men.
STEPHANIE: Not Little Homey?!
STEVE: No. They had captured Billy Scarlett...
GO TO: LOCKSLEY CASTLE. BILLY STRUGGLES IN THE GUARD'S GRIP AS HE IS LEAD INTO THE MAIN HALL WHERE LAWRENCE IS SITTING.
BILLY: I see we have a failure to communicate. I said (PULLS AWAY FROM THE GUARD) unhand me!
LAWRENCE: And who are you to demand anything?
BILLY: I am a free Englishman. I have rights.
LAWRENCE: But I am the law here, and the only rights you have are those I feel you have earned.
BILLY: Earned? (SNEERING) Exactly how does one earn a right?
LAWRENCE: Monstrum horrendum, ingens, cui lumen ademptum.
BILLY: A horrible monster, misshapen, whose eye has been put out?
LAWRENCE: A close translation. Rather well-educated for forest trash, aren't you?
BILLY: You want me to give you Patchy Hood.
LAWRENCE: Picked up on that rather quickly, did you?
BILLY: He's yours. What do you want to know?
LAWRENCE: I suppose honor among thieves really is a myth.
BILLY: Robin of Locksley is no thief. He is a crusader who is far more concerned with his claims to nobility than with the people who need him. I am simply betraying him before he can betray us.
LAWRENCE: Spare me the rationalizations. Give me Hood.
BILLY: Begin by looking at the "drunken" Friar who has far more affinity for the forest than he does wine or mead...
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST ROOM.
STEPHANIE: Billy Scarlett told the bad sheriff about Friar John?
STEVE: Yes, and when the guards went to find the Friar, Lawrence let Billy Scarlett go. Billy ran straight to Robin.
FADE TO: SHERWOOD FOREST/MERRY MEN'S HIDEOUT. BILLY SCARLETT RUSHES INTO THE HIDEOUT.
BILLY: Robin! The sheriff's men have captured Friar John Tuck and plan to hang him tomorrow!
ROBIN: Hang him?
BILLY: Well, the gas chamber and the guillotine haven't been invented yet.
ROBIN DOES A DOUBLE TAKE THEN SHAKES HIS HEAD AND BEGINS PACING.
ROBIN: We have to rescue him.
BILLY: Naturally.
ROBIN STOPS TO STARE AT BILLY.
ROBIN: This could be a trap.
BILLY: You think?
ROBIN: Are you saying that Billy-there's-a- conspiracy-behind-every-tree doesn't think it's a trap?
BILLY: I'm saying that it does not matter if it is. You either have to save him or lose that hood and cloak of "nobility."
ROBIN TURNS TO LITTLE HOMEY, SHANE, NICK, BO, AND RICHARD.
ROBIN: Men, we have a traitor among us.
NICK AND LITTLE HOMEY GLANCE AT EACH OTHER. BILLY LOOKS DOWN TO THE GROUND. BO BECOMES VISIBLY OUTRAGED.
BO: Who are you accusing, Hood?
RICHARD: May I ask what traitorous act we are accused of committing?
BO: Does it matter? Either he trusts us or he doesn't. He doesn't. I'm leaving. Anyone with me?
NICK: Count me in... or out... Whatever.
SHANE: (INTERRUPTING) Wait! Hear Robin out. He must have a reason for this. (TO ROBIN) You have a reason, do you not?
ROBIN: Friar John has been taken prisoner and is to be hanged tomorrow.
SHANE: Are you implying...?
BO: He's saying one of us ratted John out.
RICHARD: Someone must have, otherwise why was he caught?
NICK: Maybe he was out wenching again and got caught with his tights down.
BO: He's a priest.
NICK: When has he let that stop him?
SHANE: John would not endanger us for a lightskirt.
LITTLE HOMEY: Robin is right. We must have a traitor among us.
BILLY: How do you know Robin is right? Do you have any proof? How do you know that Robin didn't expose John himself?
SHANE: Why would he do that?
BILLY: Who am I, Merlin? I can't read his mind. Maybe Robin wanted to play hero and rescue him.
BO: Sounds a little far-fetched to me.
BILLY: Do not delude yourself that Robin is loyal to anyone but himself.
LITTLE HOMEY: Why do you say that?
BILLY: Just look at him. Is Robin of Locksley, knight errant, willing to risk everything... even a trap... to save his friend, or does he play the chiven?
NICK: (SOTTO VOCE) What's a chiven?
SHANE: A fish that hides in holes.
RICHARD: It's a Middle English expression that means 'playing the coward.'
NICK: Oh.
BILLY: (TO ROBIN) You claim to be loyal and noble, but you sit here doing nothing while your friend suffers. This time you will not get away with it.
ROBIN: What do you mean "this time"?
BILLY: The sheriff will catch you and have you drawn and quartered. I'll see to that.
BO: (POINTING TO BILLY) He did it. He's the traitor.
BILLY: Wrong. One cannot betray a man who has betrayed him first.
ROBIN: When have I ever betrayed you?
BILLY: That you do not know is betrayal itself. Are friends and family so easily forgotten? You are willing to make us suffer your presence now but have no thought for those who suffered in your absence.
ROBIN: If I have no thought for the family I lost, why am I fighting for Locksley now?
BILLY: Why? Vanity? Ambition? I do not know. I only know it cannot be love. If you had loved us you would not have left us!
ROBIN: Dear God...
BILLY: We had a family, or at least what resembled one. At least we had until you rode east in some vain quest for a Holy Grail. Did you think of the tears that the maid Adrienne would weep? Did you not wonder if the Lady Josephine's heart would break and in her grief she would find herself locked in some madhouse?
NICK: (SOTTO VOCE) Not to mention wielding a mean dagger.
BILLY: (TO STEVE) You asked for my trust and my faith and just when I gave it, you rode away!
ROBIN: I am sorry.
BILLY: Sorry? Sorry for the grief we suffered when we received word that Robin of Locksley had died on his quest? Sorry that the Sheriff Lawrence was free to wander Nottingham laughing at your so-called assassination? Free to pillage and r...
ROBIN INTERRUPTS BILLY BY GRABBING HIM THEN HUGGING HIM.
ROBIN: I am sorry.
BILLY: (STIFFLY) I vowed vengeance against Lawrence because of you.
ROBIN: Only to now vow vengeance against me because of Lawrence? Come, brother, do not be so contrary.
BILLY: I beggared the house of Locksley to ransom you from prison. Lawrence has destroyed everything. Everything we were. Everything we could be.
ROBIN LOOKS DEEPLY INTO BILLY'S EYES.
ROBIN: Not everything. (HE OFFERS HIS HAND) Let us be brothers again.
BILLY: You... you can forgive me?
ROBIN: If you can forgive me, Silly Willy.
BILLY: Well, maybe... but not if you start with the name calling again.
ROBIN: What name calling, Billy who walks like a filly?
BILLY: I mean it this time.
ROBIN: Sure you do.
BILLY: (SMILING AND NOW OFFERING HIS HAND) Welcome home, brother.
BILLY AND ROBIN SHAKE HANDS.
NICK: Enough of this mush. We have a randy priest to break out of jail.
OUT ON THE MERRY MEN IN A HUDDLE, PLANNING THEIR RESCUE ATTEMPT.
JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEPHANIE AND STEVE. IN PROGRESS.
STEPHANIE: I'm glad Robin and Billy made up. But what about Friar John? Are they gonna rescue him?
STEVE: I was just getting to that part, little Sweetness. The next day...
FADE TO: NOTTINGHAM VILLAGE SQUARE. A GALLOWS HAS BEEN BUILT AND THE TOWNSPEOPLE HAVE BEGUN TO GATHER. THE MAIN CASTLE DOOR SWINGS OPEN AND SHERIFF LAWRENCE MARCHES OUT, FOLLOWED BY SEVERAL SOLDIERS. AT THE END OF THE PROCESSION, TWO SOLDIERS DRAG A BOUND FRIAR JOHN ALONG. A HUSH FALLS OVER THE CROWD, BROKEN ONLY BY ISOLATED WHISPERS. LAWRENCE AND SEVERAL SOLDIERS STOP IN FRONT OF THE GALLOWS. THE OTHER SOLDIERS TAKE FRIAR JOHN UP TO THE NOOSE.
LAWRENCE: Friar John Tuck, you are hereby charged with grand theft, conspiracy to commit grand theft, reckless operation of a carriage, failure to carry a spare wheel...
AS LAWRENCE READS OFF THE CHARGES, THE MERRY MEN SNEAK INTO THE CROWD UNNOTICED BY LAWRENCE AND HIS MEN.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) Public drunkenness, failure to pay taxes, and finally, treason.
JOHN: Treason? Against who?
LAWRENCE: Me, of course!
JOHN: Treason is a crime committed against the crown, which you do not wear.
LAWRENCE: Not yet.
JOHN: Not ever.
LAWRENCE: (SHOUTING) Hangman!
THE CROWD PARTS AND THE HANGMAN STRIDES UP TO THE GALLOWS. HE IS DRESSED IN A DARK ROBE AND WEARS A BLACK HOOD OVER HIS HEAD. WITH ALL THE ATTENTION DRAWN TO THE HANGMAN, NO ONE NOTICES ROBIN CLIMBING UP TO STAND ON TOP OF THE CASTLE WALL.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) For the crimes you have committed, Tuck, the penalty is death. Hangman, carry out the sentence!
THE HANGMAN OFFERS A HOOD TO FRIAR JOHN.
JOHN: (SHAKING HIS HEAD) I will not meet my maker with my head covered in shame.
THE HANGMAN DROPS THE HOOD AND PULLS OUT A DAGGER. HE USES THE DAGGER TO PROD FRIAR JOHN TO CLIMB ON TOP OF A WOODEN BARREL POSITIONED DIRECTLY BELOW THE NOOSE. HE THEN WRAPS THE NOOSE AROUND FRIAR JOHN'S NECK. ON TOP OF THE CASTLE WALL, ROBIN NOTCHES AN ARROW IN HIS BOW AND TAKES AIM AT THE FRIAR.
LAWRENCE: Let this be a lesson to those who would break the law. (BEAT) Here endeth the lesson.
LAWRENCE NODS TO THE HANGMAN, WHO PLACES HIS FOOT ON THE BARREL. BEFORE THE HANGMAN CAN PUSH, THOUGH, ROBIN SHOOTS HIS ARROW. THE ARROW SAILS THROUGH THE AIR AND CUTS THROUGH THE ROPE JUST ABOVE THE NOOSE. AT THAT MOMENT, BILLY SCARLETT SPRINGS FROM THE CROWD ONTO THE GALLOWS. HE KICKS THE HANGMAN OUT OF THE WAY AND GRABS FRIAR JOHN.
BILLY: Come on, Friar!
PANDEMONIUM ERUPTS AS THE MERRY MEN DRAW THEIR SWORDS AND BOWS AND BEGIN FIGHTING NOTTINGHAM'S SOLDIERS. BILLY LIFTS THE FRIAR OVER HIS SHOULDER AND CARRIES HIM OFF OF THE GALLOWS, BUCKLING SLIGHTLY UNDER THE WEIGHT.
BILLY: (CONT'D) Geez, Friar, I think you'd better lay off the sauce. You've put on weight...
JOHN: Shut up, Billy. And don't take the Lord's name in vain.
BILLY: Hmph. Some gratitude. I could always drop you...
JOHN: That's quite all right, lad. You're doing fine.
BILLY: I thought so.
BILLY CARRIES THE FRIAR OUT OF SIGHT. ROBIN SMILES AS HE WATCHES THEM DISAPPEAR. HE JUMPS DOWN FROM THE CASTLE WALL AND LOOKS AROUND. HE IS SURPRISED TO SEE THAT LAWRENCE'S MEN HAVE SURROUNDED HIM AND DRAWN THEIR SWORDS. LAWRENCE SWAGGERS UP, GRINNING.
LAWRENCE: Game over, Robin Patchy Hood. Nowhere to run. (BEAT) Seize him!
ROBIN STEPS TO FLEE, BUT THE MEN OVERPOWER HIM THROUGH SHEER WEIGHT OF NUMBERS.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) We can't waste a perfectly good gallows set-up, now can we?
ROBIN: I haven't had a trial.
LAWRENCE: That is true. (BEAT) Hmmm. You just had your trial. You were found guilty. Your sentence is death.
ROBIN: That's the fastest trial I've ever heard of.
LAWRENCE: Just one of my contributions to the community... a swifter, more efficient justice system.
ROBIN: I guess it works much faster when you leave the justice out.
LAWRENCE: To the gallows with him!
THE SOLDIERS BIND ROBIN'S HANDS AND DRAG HIM TO THE GALLOWS. THE HANGMAN REAPPEARS AND FIXES A NEW NOOSE IN THE GALLOWS.
LAWRENCE: (CONT'D) Let's get this over with.
THE SOLDIERS PUSH ROBIN INTO THE HANDS OF THE HANGMAN. TO THEIR SURPRISE, THE HANGMAN PULLS OUT HIS DAGGER AND CUTS THE ROPES BINDING ROBIN'S HANDS. HE HANDS ROBIN THE DAGGER AND PICKS UP A QUARTERSTAFF. FINALLY, THE HANGMAN PULLS OFF HIS HOOD TO REVEAL HIS IDENTITY: LITTLE HOMEY. HE AND ROBIN STAND BACK TO BACK, READY TO FIGHT THE SOLDIERS.
LAWRENCE: Forget the noose! Just kill them!!!
THE SOLDIERS STEP FORWARD. SUDDENLY A VOICE RINGS OUT.
ROMAN: (V.O.) Halt!
EVERYONE TURNS TO SEE KING ROMAN APPROACH, SURROUNDED BY HIS SOLDIERS.
ROMAN: (CONT'D) No one touches those men!
THE CROWD GASPS AND FALLS SILENT. KING ROMAN STRIDES UP TO THE GALLOWS. EVERYONE KNEELS, INCLUDING ROBIN AND LITTLE HOMEY.
ROMAN: Robin, my friend, rise.
ROBIN STANDS AND ROMAN EMBRACES HIM.
ROBIN: It's good to see you back safe, m'lord.
ROMAN: And you, Robin. I thought we had lost you. Word came that you had been imprisoned.
ROBIN: Indeed I had. But my faith in our cause kept me alive.
ROMAN: Good man. (LOOKING AROUND) Now, where is that sister of mine? Where is Marian?
LAWRENCE PUSHES THROUGH THE CROWD, PULLING MARIAN BY THE ARM.
LAWRENCE: Here she is, sire! I have personally watched over her and ensured her safety.
MARIAN: (PULLING HER ARM AWAY) Hah! (TO ROMAN) Roman, I'm so glad you have returned. This animal locked me up in his castle!
ROMAN: (POINTING TO LAWRENCE) Take him away!
KING ROMAN'S SOLDIERS GRAB LAWRENCE AND HAUL HIM AWAY. ROMAN AND MARIAN HUG. FRIAN JOHN, BILLY SCARLETT, AND THE REST OF THE MERRY MEN GATHER AROUND.
ROMAN: (CONT'D) Are you all right?
MARIAN: I'm fine... now.
MARIAN TURNS TO ROBIN.
MARIAN: (CONT'D) Robin, are you all right?
ROBIN: Yes.
MARIAN: I believe you have yet to collect your prize.
ROBIN: My prize?
MARIAN: For winning the archery contest, of course.
ROBIN: Of course. You are right.
ROBIN TAKES MARIAN'S HAND AND PULLS HER CLOSE. AFTER A PAUSE, THEY KISS PASSIONATELY. ROMAN LOOKS ON CURIOUSLY.
ROMAN: What is this?
MARIAN: There was an archery contest, m'lord. The prize was a kiss. Robin was the winner.
ROMAN: I see. (TO ROBIN) With a kiss like that, I do hope your intentions are honorable.
ROBIN LOOKS AT MARIAN, THEN AT ROMAN.
ROBIN: The most honorable, m'lord. (TO MARIAN) If the lady is of a similar mind, of course.
MARIAN: She is. (TO ROMAN) Do we have your blessing?
ROMAN: I don't know. You are of noble blood, sister. You can't marry just anyone.
MARIAN: But...
ROMAN: Robin, kneel.
MARIAN: Roman...?
ROBIN KNEELS. ROMAN DRAWS HIS SWORD.
ROMAN: (TOUCHING THE SWORD TO ROBIN'S SHOULDER) I dub you Sir Robin of Locksley. (TOUCHING THE SWORD TO ROBIN'S OTHER SHOULDER) Rise now, Sir Robin of Locksley.
ROBIN STANDS UP. ROMAN LOOKS AT MARIAN.
ROMAN: (CONT'D) Now you have my blessing.
ROBIN AND MARIAN KISS. THE CROWD CHEERS. ROMAN TURNS TO FRIAR JOHN.
ROMAN: (CONT'D) Well, Friar, it looks like I'm going to have an outlaw for an in-law!
ROMAN BURSTS OUT LAUGHING. FRIAR JOHN JOINS IN HIS LAUGHTER. ROBIN AND MARIAN KISS AGAIN. HOLD ON THE TWO.
FADE TO: JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE/GUEST BEDROOM. STEVE REACHES OUT AND STROKES STEPHANIE'S HAIR.
STEVE: And Robin and Marian lived happily ever after.
STEPHANIE: The end?
STEVE: The end.
STEPHANIE: Daddy?
STEVE: Yeah?
STEPHANIE: Are you and Mommy going to live happily ever after like Robin and Marian?
STEVE: Well, um... I... I don't know, little Sweetness.
STEPHANIE: Does Mommy know?
STEVE: I don't think so. Not now.
STEPHANIE: Maybe I should ask her.
STEVE: No, I don't think that would be a very good idea. It might make Mommy upset. You wouldn't want that, would you?
STEPHANIE: No.
STEVE: It's time for you to go to sleep, okay?
STEPHANIE: Okay, Daddy. G'night.
STEVE: Good night.
STEVE LEANS DOWN AND KISSES STEPHANIE. THEN HE PULLS THE COVERS UP TO HER CHIN. HE GETS UP, WALKS TO THE DOOR, AND TURNS OFF THE LIGHT. HE OPENS THE DOOR AND PAUSES, WATCHING STEPHANIE AS SHE CLOSES HER EYES. HE SMILES SADLY. HOLD ON STEVE. AND OUT. FADE TO BLACK.
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