New Cards for Dork Sovereigns, the next Jyhad expansion

Here's a few of the new card from Dork Sovereigns...

Pentium Laptop equipment 2 pool

+1.999999999873415 bleed

THC Laced Blood Master out-of-turn

(Picture; a spaced-out guy smoking a joint, Duck sneaking up behind him)

Play when a vampire successfully hunts. The vampire immediatly untaps and attempts to bleed a random Methuselah. On subsequent turns, the vampire must hunt until she is at full capacity. (Munchies!)

Overeaters Anonymous Master - Unique Location 2 pool

(Picture; a stream of really, *really* fat people walking out of a building. Igo- the Hungry lurks in an alley nearby with a huge grin...)

All your vampires gain +1 blood when hunting. Any vampire can burn Overeaters Anonymous as a (D) action, gaining 1 blood if successful.

Abstract art painting unique equipment 1 pool

(Picture; Uriah Winter holding a bizzare painting in front of him, hiding behind it. Anneke is staring at it raptly, an assault rifle lying at her feet.)

Bearer may strike; combat ends if in combat with a Toreador. If so, the Toreador gains possession of the Painting.

The Count Malkavian 6 capacity

FOR DOM PRE tha

2... 2... 2 wonderful hand damage! Haa haa haa...

Pizza Shift Political action Prince/Justicar

Select a Methuselah who has more pizza than you. Divide up to # slices among the Methuselahs as you see fit. # is the number of Methuselahs currently in the game. Successful vote means the pizza is apportioned as you announced.