After Zane quit drinking he had a lot of free time on his hands. Seeing the Jiffy Splicetm on holovid he thought gene splicing would make a great hobby. Make extra money in your spare time! Learn a valuable trade at home! The ads were great, one of them even let you do a holographic simulacrum of a sample gene splicing with pull down menus. Zane was mesmerized, he ordered one immediately at the end of the ad. The power of life in your hands! He spliced a Tyrannosaurus and a fruit fly in the sample ad and got a miniature flying T-rex. Join the cult of modern Gods! When the box arrived WPS, Zane tried to tip the driver in his excitement. The box was heavy but it had all the special fittings and software he'd requested so he could hook it up to his ancient Macintosh Ultrapower ZDX 2001.
His first project was to rid the house of roaches to make up for all the trouble over the basement catfish farm that had cost them a $300 water bill and a big stink. And not even one catfish. Sasha would be amazed and grateful when the roaches were gone. Besides there had to be a profit in a design for a better roach trap. The Jiffy Splicetm consisted of a little oven thing that tripled as incubator, protein synthesizer and DNA splicer. Just feed a little protein rich food in the round hole on top, program a splice from the millions of available gene maps, wait fourteen days and viola! Another flop.
It was six months before anything even barely alive came out of the
Jiffy Splicetm. It, whatever IT was died a merciful death in
just under seven minutes.
Continued
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All photos are by Androo Kratochvil.
All stories ©Gregory Lee Jones
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