That's right, no television for eighteen years.
That's right, no television for eighteen years.
Well, OK, I had access to television. There were some in the dormitory (residence hall, according to the University of Michigan Housing Office) I could watch, but I didn't bother much. There was one in the third place I lived after leaving the dorm, which I watched perhaps two hours a week. There was one in the second house I lived after the dorm, but I never watched it. The next television was my first.
A better chronology:
Let's see. In the seventies, some friends told me I should come to their place and watch some television. We argued a bit, and I relented. They had a show in mind that would change my mind about purchasing a TV.
The show was called Charlie's Angels.
It sucked.
There was an emptiness in my hosts that mirrored the manifest lack of meaningful content of the television program and its accompanying commercials. They sat in the room, staring blankly at the feeble "plot" of the show, commenting on the "cute" commercials now and again. Something had happened to my hosts. They were not the same people I knew from my years in the dorm.
Television had done something to them.
I don't recall anything about the show or the rest of the evening. My refusal to turn into some kind of television drone may have caused me to block the events. The only thing I vaguely recall is leaving, suddenly. Eventually, I came to realize my hosts were probably much like what I saw before the television program began.
There were a couple other shows friends insisted I watch, but the shows weren't polite or memorable. Speaking of being pummeled, there was something called Mork and Mindy that was just painful to watch. A fellow named Robin Williams seemed to be the star obnoxious jerk. (For obnoxious jerks, one must now settle for Jerry Seinfeld or David Letterman, two people who have TV shows that exist for those who've been beaten into absolute submission by their jobs.)
Mork and Mindy so insulted me that I refused to watch that Williams creature for years, no matter what he appeared in, until I saw Disney's Alladin, which aside from being rather warped (but fun for kids) was a good vehicle for Williams. He's more than tolerable -- sometimes he's actually funny.
There was something called Saturday Night Live that was fun to watch. Too bad I was working an afternoon shift, and rarely was able to watch more than half-an-hour of it. Also, I missed the early era, so it wasn't as good as it could have been.
During the time I wasn't watching television, people suddenly started misspelling my name "Spenser". For years, people got it right, then <blink> they became stupid about it. At parties I was asked if I were "for hire"; I'd stare blankly. None of this made sense. I figured there was something in the water/booze.
Years later, understanding came. Obviously, once again, television warps minds.
Nowadays, there's a television in the living room, along with a VCR. A recent change in life caused me to purchase them to watch movies I had missed all those years. Like everyone with their first VCR, I pumped hundreds of movies into it and enjoyed every single minute.
Sunday, Monday and Tuesday evenings were nights for television. The Star Trek shows (I missed the first four or five years of ST:TNG) and Babylon 5 maintained my interest. I mute the sound when commercials appear. When elsewhere, I tape what I want to see and watch it later, though this can lead to writing over tapes I want to save and running out of tape 'cause I'm too lazy to pay attention to the damn tube.
If you want to see good television, watch Babylon 5.
There have been a few very good television shows in the medium's short history. The Prisoner. The Twilight Zone (Rod Serling's version). Night Gallery (Rod Serling, again). The early Outer Limits shows. VR5.
The above are mostly science fiction shows. They translate best, when they translate onto television well. Fiction, spy stories, thrillers, comedies and "variety shows" (Carol Burnett's shows excepted) don't work well and seem mostly to exist to sell useless products and give people a reason to clip coupons.
Damned good television: Serling's shows gripped one's psyche. One didn't care who the sponsor was or what the ratings were. Same with The Prisoner; Patrick McGoohan put together a story so spellbinding one couldn't resist watching it week after week. VR5 was akin to a personal journey.
Babylon 5 should be given a chance. Its spinoff, Crusade, was also excellent, though it ended early. If you liked B5 and Star Trek (yes, liking both is possible, and I do mean the original Star Trek), Crusade would definitely appeal -- it had exploration, a sense of wonder, and timely acts of absolute desperation.
I recommend against watching science fantasy shows like Lexx, Roswell and Farscape. Run. Run far away. Especially from Farscape. There's very little science thataway. The speculative portions of those shows has been mashed into something very smelly, and you'll get slimed.
Television in general? There was CNN for news (CNN was amusing), but it changed so much in 2000 or 2001 that it's not worthwhile, except for the hosts it had in its glory days.
The SCI-FI channel (good name! sci-fi isn't the same as science fiction) is OK for dumb fun, and can be worthwhile if there's ironing to do, or doing the dishes.
For plain fun, there was Sliders. Buffy the Vampire Slayer (yay, Buffy! Slay 'em!) is superb. Millenium was good to watch; it was deadly serious, and it's unfortunate it was taken off the air. Viper was fun, though sometimes just stupid, like a good fun show that had a rough time on the playground when it was small, but Howard Chaykin had something to do with it, and Eddie Jobson did the theme song, so it couldn't be a bad program. Add smiley where appropriate.
As of January 2003, there's still Buffy, its spinoff Angel, and the exciting 24.
Stargate SG-1 has matured into an excellent sf show. I've read there were some rough spots, but haven't seen enough of it, I suppose.
La Femme Nikita was great at its best and average at its most inconsistent, though it was quite different from the movie of its origins, very much like Buffy. Unfortunately, whoever is showing Nikita also shows commercials during the show, so I tend to turn off the TV after the third or fourth insult.
Star Trek: DS9 was good to watch for its treatment of non-traditional religions; it had real gods!
Television is supposed to sell advertising and products. You can have fun with it anyway. Turn off the sound when you don't like it, and turn the thing off when you're offended. You'll enjoy it a lot more. Also: if you haven't turned the thing off for at least a month at a time, do so. Tape what you want to see. You could even try not watching it a few days out of each week to see how your life changes. It can't help but change for the better.