Contents Practice Course Personal View Help

Chapter 7: Writing Routine, Good-News, and Goodwill Messages

Sending Routine Replies and Positive Messages

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When responding positively to a request or sending a good-news or goodwill message, you have several goals: to communicate the good news, answer all questions, provide all required details, and leave your reader with a good impression of you and your firm. This sort of message can be quite brief and to the point. However, even though you may be doing someone a favor by responding to a request, you want to be courteous and upbeat and maintain a you-oriented tone.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Strategy for Routine Replies and Positive Messages

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Like requests, routine replies and positive messages have an opening, a body, and a close. Readers receiving these messages will generally be interested in what you have to say, so you'll usually use the direct approach. Place your main idea (the positive reply or the good news) in the opening. Use the middle to explain all the relevant details, and close cordially, perhaps highlighting a benefit to your reader.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Start with the Main Idea

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

By beginning your positive message with the main idea or good news, you're preparing your audience for the detail that follows. Try to make your opening clear and concise. Although the following introductory statements make the same point, one is cluttered with unnecessary information that buries the purpose, whereas the other is brief and to the point:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Instead of This
I am pleased to inform you that after deliberating the matter carefully, our human resources committee has recommended you for appointment as a staff accountant. Write This
Congratulations! You've been selected to join our firm as a staff accountant, beginning March 20.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

The best way to write a clear opening is to have a clear idea of what you want to say. Before you put one word on paper, ask yourself, "What is the single most important message I have for the audience?"

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Provide Necessary Details and Explanation

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

The middle part of a positive message is typically the longest. You need the space to explain your point completely so that the audience will experience no confusion or lingering doubt. In addition to providing details in the middle section, maintain the supportive tone established at the beginning. This tone is easy to continue when your message is purely good news, as in this example:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Your educational background and internship have impressed us, and we believe you would be a valuable addition to Green Valley Properties. As discussed during your interview, your salary will be $3,300 per month, plus benefits. In that regard, you will meet with our benefits manager, Paula Sanchez, at 8:00 a.m. on Monday, March 20. She will assist you with all the paperwork necessary to tailor our benefit package to your family situation. She will also arrange various orientation activities to help you acclimate to our company.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

However, if your routine message is mixed and must convey mildly disappointing information, put the negative portion of your message into as favorable a context as possible:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Instead of This
No, we no longer carry the Sportsgirl line of sweaters. Write This
The new Olympic line has replaced the Sportsgirl sweaters that you asked about. Olympic features a wider range of colors and sizes and more contemporary styling.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

The more complete description is less negative and emphasizes how the audience can benefit from the change. Be careful, though: You can use negative information in this type of message only if you're reasonably sure the audience will respond positively. Otherwise, use the indirect approach (discussed in Chapter 8).

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

End with a Courteous Close

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Your message is most likely to succeed if your readers are left feeling that you have their personal welfare in mind. You accomplish this either by highlighting a benefit to the audience or by expressing appreciation or goodwill. If follow-up action is required, clearly state who will do what next.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Types of Routine Replies and Positive Messages

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Innumerable types of routine replies and positive messages are used in business every day. Many of the routine positive messages that you'll be writing will likely fall into major categories. Take a moment to consider five such categories: granting requests for information and action, granting claims and requests for adjustments, providing recommendations and references, announcing good news, and sending goodwill messages.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Granting Requests for Information and Action

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

If your answer to a request is yes or is straightforward information, the direct plan is appropriate. Your prompt, gracious, and thorough response will positively influence how people think about your company, its products, your department, and you. Readers' perceptions are the reason that Karen Donohue of Campbell Soup is so sensitive to the tone of her memos, letters, and other messages. Donohue makes it a point to adopt the "you" attitude in all her business correspondence.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Many requests are similar. For example, a human resources department gets a lot of routine inquiries about job openings. To handle repetitive queries like these, companies usually develop form responses. Although these messages are often criticized as being cold and impersonal, you can put a great deal of thought into wording them, and you can use computers to personalize and mix paragraphs. Thus, a computerized form letter prepared with care may actually be more personal and sincere than a quickly dictated, hastily typed "personal" reply. Julian Zamakis wrote to McBride Department Stores for information on employment opportunities and received the encouraging reply in Figure 7–5.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments


Figure 7–5	In-Depth Critique: Letter Replying to Request for Information

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When you're answering requests and a potential sale is involved, you have three main goals: (1) to respond to the inquiry and answer all questions, (2) to leave your reader with a good impression of you and your firm, and (3) to encourage the future sale. The following letter succeeds in meeting all three objectives:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Granting Claims and Requests for Adjustment

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Satisfied customers bring additional business to a firm; angry or dissatisfied customers do not. In addition, angry customers complain to anyone who'll listen, creating poor public relations. So even though claims and adjustments may seem unpleasant, progressive businesspeople such as Campbell Soup's Karen Donohue treat claims and requests for adjustment as golden opportunities to build customer loyalty.³

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Few people go to the trouble of requesting an adjustment unless they actually have a problem. So the most sensible reaction to a routine claim is to assume that the claimant's account of the transaction is an honest statement of what happened—unless the same customer repeatedly submits dubious claims or the dollar amount is very large. When you receive a complaint, respond promptly. You'll want to investigate the problem first to determine what went wrong and why. You'll also want to determine whether your company, your customer, or a third party is at fault.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When Your Company Is at Fault

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

The usual human response to a bad situation is to say, "It wasn't my fault!" However, businesspeople can't take that stance. When your company is at fault and your response to a claim is positive, you must protect your company's image and try to regain the customer's goodwill by referring to company errors carefully. Don't blame an individual or a specific department. And avoid lame excuses such as "Nobody's perfect" or "Mistakes will happen." Don't promise that problems will never happen again; such guarantees are unrealistic and often beyond your control. Instead, explain your company's efforts to do a good job, implying that the error was an unusual incident.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

For example, a large mail-order clothing company has created the following form letter to respond to customers who claim they haven't received exactly what was ordered. The form letter can be customized through word processing and then individually signed:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

In contrast, a response letter written as a personal answer to a unique claim would start with a clear statement of the good news: the settling of the claim according to the customer's request. Here is a more personal response from Klondike Gear:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Here is your heather-blue wool-and-mohair sweater (size large) to replace the one returned to us with a defect in the knitting on the left sleeve. Thanks for giving us the opportunity to correct this situation. Customers' needs have come first at Klondike Gear for 27 years. Our sweaters are handmade by the finest knitters in this area.

Our newest catalog is enclosed. Browse through it and see what wonderful new colors and patterns we have for you. Whether you are skiing or driving a snowmobile, Klondike Gear offers you the best protection available from wind, snow, and cold. Let us know how we may continue to serve you and your sporting needs.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When the Customer Is at Fault

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When your customer is at fault (perhaps washing a dry-clean-only sweater in hot water), you can (1) refuse the claim and attempt to justify your refusal or (2) simply do what the customer asks. But remember, if you refuse the claim, you may lose your customer—as well as many of the customer's friends, who will hear only one side of the dispute. You must weigh the cost of making the adjustment against the cost of losing future business from one or more customers.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

If you choose to grant the claim, you can start off with the good news: You're replacing the merchandise or refunding the purchase price. However, the middle section needs more attention. Your job is to make the customer realize that the merchandise was mistreated, but you want to avoid being condescending ("Perhaps you failed to read the instructions carefully") or preachy ("You should know that wool shrinks in hot water").

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

The dilemma is this: If the customer fails to realize what went wrong, you may commit your firm to an endless procession of returned merchandise; but if you insult the customer, your cash refund will have been wasted because you'll lose your customer anyway. Without being offensive, the letter in Figure 7–6 educates a customer about how to treat his in-line skates.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments


Figure 7–6	In-Depth Critique: Letter Responding to a Claim When the Buyer Is at Fault

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When a Third Party Is at Fault

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Sometimes neither you nor the claimant is at fault. Perhaps the carrier damaged merchandise in transit. Or perhaps the original manufacturer is responsible for some product defect. When a third party is at fault, you have three options:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•

Simply honor the claim. This option is the most attractive. You can satisfy your customer with the standard good-news letter and no additional explanation. This way you maintain your reputation for fair dealing and bear no cost (because the carrier, manufacturer, or other third party will reimburse you for the damage).

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Honor the claim, but explain you're not at fault. This option corrects any impression that the damage was caused by your negligence. You can still write the standard good-news letter, but stress the explanation.

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•

Refer the claimant to the third party. This option is almost always a bad choice. When you suggest filing a claim with the firm that caused the defect or damage, you fail to satisfy the claimant's needs. The exception is when you're trying to dissociate yourself from any legal responsibility for the damaged merchandise, especially if it has caused a personal injury, in which case you would send a bad-news message (see Chapter 8).

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

Providing Recommendations and References

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

When writing a letter of recommendation, you want to convince readers that the person being recommended has the characteristics necessary for the job or benefit being sought. Your letter must contain all the relevant details:

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Candidate's full name

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Job or benefit being sought

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Nature of your relationship with the candidate

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Whether you're answering a request or taking the initiative

Comments by Dr. McMurrey

Add/Edit Comments

•	Facts relevant to the position or benefit sought

Comments by Dr. McMurrey